Tuff Guyz

Today was "every other Thursday" — meaning that Connor's great-grandparents were in town to hang out with the little guy and be his punching bag for the day.

Liberated, I did what any parent with a free pass would do — I hid out and watched a movie in the bedroom, far away from the action of lobbed utensils at the kitchen table and the constant drone of Connor repeating the phrase "Bown" [meaning that he wants to watch "Barney" again].

Separated from the chaos, I endulged myself in a viewing of The Big Red One: The Reconstruction, starring none other than the badass of all badasses: Lee Marvin, star of my most favorite film of all time, The Dirty Dozen. After the movie and requisite documentary that accompanied the DVD [or D-D-D, in Connorspeak], so inspired by Marvin's performance as tough-as-non-liquid-nails Sergeant Samuel Fuller, I found myself wandering around the yard for a rock to shave my face with and a tree branch to brush my teeth with, while trying to push over a 100-foot-tall pine tree with my bare hands.

Realizing that I probably wasn't quite ready for the "rock shave," I came back in the house and began an online search for a straight razor for shaving instead. After reading a horrifying "how to" which contained the sentence "or you'll be duct taping your Adam's Apple back on," I instead decided that tomorrow Connor and I will go get a nice, safe plastic razor at Wal-Mart (if the Big Lots search is unsuccessful, of course).

Some dudes are tougher than others, I guess.