Act your age! (redux)
A few years ago — I was 26 at the time, I think — I was in a casino in Atlantic City, and a security guard walked up to me with a smirk on his face just minutes after I had entered the facility.
"Okay, let's see your ID," he said, like a mother asking her son if he had eaten any cookies, when she could plainly see the crumbs on the child's face. "I'm sure this looks like fun, but you have to be 21 to be in here, ya know?"
Without saying a word, I calmly pulled out my driver's license and held it out for him to inspect.
"Oh, I, uh, I'm sorry," he said hesitantly. "Enjoy your evening."
For whatever reason, I look young for my age. I didn't realize just how young until this specific incident. But, when I was 19, I didn't have any trouble getting into several different casinos in Las Vegas. But, then again, I when I was younger, I looked older. Are you following all of this? I am going somewhere here...bear with me.
This morning, my car still in the shop, we took a family trip to drop Stacey off at work since I would need the car during the day. After dropping her off, Connor and I killed some time in the school's student center as it was raining outside, putting playground time out of the picture.
Everything about the way I was dressed this morning probably screamed "college student:" Camo cargo shorts, vintage-looking T-shirt, tennis shoes, bookbag...except that the bookbag was filled with diapers, wipes, cookies and any other necessity a parent might need out on the front lines. Oh, and there was a 17-month-old blond whirlwind of a kid leading me around. I got a lot of second glances, but none as satisfying as that of a university employee who had been very conspicuously watching us for at least a few minutes — though she said nothing nor smiled, even though we tried to say hi. Connor ran up to a newspaper rack, curious about its contents, so I scooped him up and dropped him inside. I noticed the woman was still staring intently, so I said to her, "you know, looking for a good place to leave him. I think he can get out of here. Got any better ideas?"
She went back to pretending that she wasn't watching us. I went back to not caring that she was.
"Okay, let's see your ID," he said, like a mother asking her son if he had eaten any cookies, when she could plainly see the crumbs on the child's face. "I'm sure this looks like fun, but you have to be 21 to be in here, ya know?"
Without saying a word, I calmly pulled out my driver's license and held it out for him to inspect.
"Oh, I, uh, I'm sorry," he said hesitantly. "Enjoy your evening."
For whatever reason, I look young for my age. I didn't realize just how young until this specific incident. But, when I was 19, I didn't have any trouble getting into several different casinos in Las Vegas. But, then again, I when I was younger, I looked older. Are you following all of this? I am going somewhere here...bear with me.
This morning, my car still in the shop, we took a family trip to drop Stacey off at work since I would need the car during the day. After dropping her off, Connor and I killed some time in the school's student center as it was raining outside, putting playground time out of the picture.
Everything about the way I was dressed this morning probably screamed "college student:" Camo cargo shorts, vintage-looking T-shirt, tennis shoes, bookbag...except that the bookbag was filled with diapers, wipes, cookies and any other necessity a parent might need out on the front lines. Oh, and there was a 17-month-old blond whirlwind of a kid leading me around. I got a lot of second glances, but none as satisfying as that of a university employee who had been very conspicuously watching us for at least a few minutes — though she said nothing nor smiled, even though we tried to say hi. Connor ran up to a newspaper rack, curious about its contents, so I scooped him up and dropped him inside. I noticed the woman was still staring intently, so I said to her, "you know, looking for a good place to leave him. I think he can get out of here. Got any better ideas?"
She went back to pretending that she wasn't watching us. I went back to not caring that she was.
posted by Carter at 9:19 PM
3 Comments:
that's hilarious. You're the only Davis who's quick-witted enough to even come up with such a great line. I'd think of that one later that night while laying in bed. But then again, you always were the sharpest tool in the family shed. Well, definitely at least the quickest.
When my kids were little I always kept them on a really short teather. For the most part I still do, and it is obvious to everyone around me that I am their father. One day while playing at a large park next to a even larger petting zoo and farmstead, they both got a little ahead of me. I was just about to reel them in when a woman who had been watching us for some time said, "Hey, you'd better watch it someone could take them." To which I replied. "That's OK, they'll bring'em back pretty quick." That got me a really snotty look.
My mom said, she had noticed to woman watching us and couldn't figure out why she thought I was an inattentive father. Some people, sheesh.
YOU ARE ENJOYING THIS WAY TOO MUCH.
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